Feeling alone

So, that is strange the Madame Zaritska's reading said that about feeling alone, because that is exactly how I have felt. I am not trying to make my hubby sound like a horrible man, hubby, or father, because he is none of those. He is still the most wonderful man alive. It's just he hasn't really shown a whole lot of attention to me lately, nor has he shown really any sympathy for me and the changes that my body is going through. I realize though, that he is a man, and has never experienced pregnancy, and could never really understand completely how I feel or understand all the changes that my body is going through. Sometimes I feel like he is just tired of hearing me gripe and complain about all my aches and pains. I don't blame him, sometimes I get tired of doing the griping and complaining. This pregnancy, I have felt much better this time since I haven't really had any morning sickness, so I have tried to enjoy it!! However, I can't help that this little man has decided to try out kick-boxing in there and practicing using my bladder. Those quick little jabs can be quite painful. Not to mention all my weight that I have lost and then regained- I gained in my belly. So, it is causing a lot of back pain. And then the sciatic pain and pressure down low. IT JUST ALL HURTS sometimes. And I can't help but share. I can't pretend I am not in pain. I can't pretend that I can walk when in fact there is a sharp stabbing pain down low or in my buttocks. It is hard to pretend past some of these pains. I can't pretend that I can get out of bed w/o discomfort, or pretend that getting up off the couch isn't a struggle! Turning over in bed is quite a task at hand as well. I just wish I were able to pretend everything was easy and nothing was painful, but I can't. But besides me feeling like I am getting on his nerves, when I would talk to him about names, he could care less. He wasn't this difficult to discuss names with when I was pregnant with Madison. So, I have a hard time understanding why he didn't want to discuss names this time. Why wouldn't you care and want to put your in-put on what you are naming your son? After all, he always wanted a son. I just thought he would be more excited to finally be getting his wish... a son!! I thought he would be beside himself, but so not the case. I will talk about when Kaiden kicks me, or is moving. Try to get him to watch my belly when Kaiden is moving it all over the place. Try to get him to "feel" him kick. He will look at my belly, or leave his hand there for a min when I place it on my belly, but he never seems that excited. Maybe it's just him. I felt cheated when I was prego with Madison and I can't help but feel that way again this time. I see on TV, movies, or hear from friends about how excited their boyfriends/hubbies are with their pregnancies. Kissing their bellies, talking to the baby in the belly- heck some of them even reading to the baby!!! Always placing their hands on the belly to "feel" the baby move! Talking about the baby, offering comfort/support to their pregnant woman! Rubbing their feet, or back. Offering to get them stuff. Steve was more supportive with Madison I will agree. Maybe b/c he knew I hadn't been through it before and I was very nervous. Maybe too b/c our relationship was still somewhat new. I mean, we had only been married two months when we got pregnant. And we were only together 10 months when we got married. So, maybe the newness of our relationship hadn't worn off.
Sometimes, I think it is his job. He went back to working full time and of all things being the manager. So he has had a lot on his plate the past few months. SO, I am thinking that has a lot to do with it. I am happy that he is giving it up, before the baby gets here. I hope once he gives it up he is more attentive to me and the kids. I want our children to grow up with their father and to know that he loves then so much! I want him to be very active in their lives! My dad gets on my nerves 98% of the time, but he was a very great active father and did lots of stuff with us growing up. I want him to be more like my dad was with us!
Other than that- men at work have no sympathy either. They think I can pull, lift patients just like they can! I am not hurting myself, or the baby- and not risking going into premature labor.
They don't help with pulling/lifting/or transporting patients.